Dear Old Me,
I have good news and I have bad. The good is that you will get over that heartache. I know you feel like it’s impossible right now but you will. You will feel love again even after you swore you wouldn’t, and it will be just as magical as you expected. The bad news is there is more heartache to come, and it will hurt far more than anything has ever hurt before, but this time you know you can survive; and you know that it gets better.
You are going to face some huge decisions. You will wonder afterwards if you made the right ones; if a different choice could’ve led you down another path to somewhere else. The truth is you will never be sure, but you will stop wondering. What could’ve been won’t matter, because the path you are on is an incredible one.
It turns out that the cliches are true. Everything does happen for a reason, and it will all fall into place eventually. You’ll see. That broken heart led you to a place you were meant to be in, the place that will become just the beginning.
Please be kinder to yourself. It’s ok to not have all the answers, to still be figuring it all out. It’s not ok to beat yourself up over it.
It’s also ok to admit that you’re struggling or that you need help. One day you’ll be so low that you’ll have to reach out, and you’ll realise it wasn’t as hard as you always thought it would be. You’ll be so surprised by the help you are offered by people who love you, just let them know you need it.
You need to stop thinking your way is the only way. One day you’ll learn that there are a million ways to get something done, and yours isn’t necessarily the best. Try harder to let go of some control, it’ll ease the burden on your shoulders and make someone else feel needed in the way they want to be.
The stuff you worry about now is going to seem so insignificant soon. You will actually laugh at the things you used to stress over. Try to keep some perspective. None of this will matter in 5 years time, and you’ll regret all the time you spent making yourself miserable over it.
You will also wonder what you did with all the free time you used to have. Enjoy it.
Stop calling yourself fat. In a few years you’re going to look back and wish you still looked the way you do now so make the most of it. Appreciate your body more, it’s about to do something remarkable.
Also stop saying you’re tired. Just wait, you have no idea what being tired is yet.
I wish you knew how wonderful you are. How strong, determined and brilliant you’re becoming. One day you’ll have a little piece of your heart walking next to you. You’ll see so much of yourself in him and he’ll be so so incredible, you’ll see how amazing you’ve helped him become.
Get ready because the next few years are a roller coaster. They’ll be the best and the worst of your life. But I’m writing this from the other side so that’s proof you’ll survive, and I promise you it gets easier.
Stay strong, it’ll be worth it.
Love New Me