Dating: My Tinder Turn Offs

A while ago someone asked me what were my hard nos for Tinder, and since then I’ve been giving it a lot of thought so I figured I’d make a list. Here’s my top list of things that make me swipe left straight away.

1. Snapchat filters. Nope, absolutely not pal

2. Photos of cars – I’m looking to date a human, not a transformer

3. Tories

4. Men named Adam, soz but no thanks

5. Men named Dylan, it would just be weird wouldn’t it?

6. Pictures with tigers/elephants/koalas to show how ‘well travelled’ they are

7. Blurry photos – if you can’t even manage a decent selfie you’re not going to fulfil my opening for an insta-boyfriend are you?!

8. Only 1 photo. Need more than 1 shot or I’m going to assume you’re a catfish.

9. Any mention of being a gamer or loving their PlayStation/Xbox

10. Lots of group photos – if I can’t figure out which one you are in under a second I’m swiping left

11. Wanky quotes, or memes instead of photos – for obvious reasons

12. Pictures of abs/arms/dicks/tattoos with no face shots – pretty much a guaranteed prawn

13. Fish. It’s awesome that you’re proud of your latest catch, I however don’t give a shit and will not be joining you at the riverside

14. Tinder Presentations, or links to a website with a video on why I should date them. I’ve seen both and ew gross

And just for balance, I will probably swipe right if:

1. They have a decent beard

2. They look like Aquaman/Thor/James Corden

3. Their bio makes me laugh

4. They list chef as their job role

5. Anti brexit chat/mention of Jeremy Corbyn/joint hatred for Tories

What are (or what would be if you’re not single!) your turn offs?! Send me some more and I’ll add them to the list!

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